Oprah spent a good deal of her interview with Kate Winslet raving about how great Winslet looks naked and how she admires Kate’s body, saying “God bless your real breasts! I love the fact that you have real breasts! I love that you have real breasts! Because in all the breast scenes, your breasts do what real breasts do.” Oprah went on to say, “There’s that wonderful moment, you are lying on your back and your breasts stay apart. If you look at women with not-real breasts their breasts are sticking straight up. That’s how you know. God bless your real breasts!” With the February sweeps period coming up, ABC’s promo department is already editing together a promo that’ll go something like this:
Announcer: Today on Oprah…
Oprah: Breasts!
Oprah: Real breasts!
Oprah: Breasts!
Oprah: Breast scenes
Oprah: Real breasts
Oprah: Your breasts
Oprah: Breasts
Oprah: Not-real breasts
Oprah: Breasts are sticking straight up.
Oprah: Breasts!
Announcer: ABC 7 – stay tuned for America’s most beloved
Oprah: Breasts!

A few months back, Ellen got a huge amount of attention by crying over a rescue dog.   Last week, Oprah got a lot of press by dedicating Friday’s show to her cocker spaniel, Sophie, who died last month from kidney failure.  Now, it seems viewers of other daytime talk shows are demanding the other hosts jump on the canine-coddling bandwagon.  Responding to thousands of emailed requests, Maury Povich will protest dog-fighting by wearing a choke chain and muzzle on his show next week, Rachael Ray will shave her head in sympathy with her terrier who’s undergoing chemo treatments, and to protest shelters that are quick to euthanize strays, Dr. Phil is having Dr. Kevorkian come on his show and put him down. 

Oprah Winfrey plans to dedicate an upcoming show to her cocker spaniel, Sophie, who died last month from kidney failure.   “Sophie gave me 13 years of unconditional love. She was a true love in my life,” Winfrey says on the broadcast scheduled to air Friday. The show will be attended by 500 dogs, each of whom will be given Bluetooth-enabled collars made of spun gold, bowls of Waterford crystal, 2100-square foot doghouses with ocean views, and cashmere wee-wee pads.  In addition, each dog will be given their own car to chase.

Southern Ledger

Oprah Winfrey’s BFF Gayle King has moved into a penthouse purchased in the name of Oprah’s recently departed pooch, Sophie.  A company called Sophie’s Penthouse LLC bought a $7.1 million home in New York and the talk show host’s pal has moved in lock stock and barrel.   According to a realtor who works in the area, the home is a beauty, but “it’s a bit odd.  It has a kennel cage that sleeps five, an invisible fence, a licking room, an orchard full of trees that are laden with juicy squirrels, a fully stocked meat cellar, and a fountain to chase cats into.” 

NY Post

Two years after the controversy surrounding James Frey’s “A Million Little Pieces,” Oprah has used her magazine to promote another “memoir” which has turned out to be a fake.  “Love and Consequences” was written by Margaret B. Jones, a self described half white, half Native American foster child and former drug runner who turns out to be all white and was educated in ritzy private schools.

Hey Oprah, how about MY memoir?   Yes, I’m now a blogger using the name Dave Hanson but I only go by the name to escape my painful childhood.  In truth, my name is Little Red Riding Hood and when I was a child a big bad wolf made inappropriate advances to me.  He murdered my grandmother in front of me and tried to kill and eat me; in fact a hunter had to cut him open and rescue me.  This gruesome event scarred me forever; it took three stints in rehab and years of therapy to get over my fear of forests.   But now I’m recovered and a mom, and ready to tell the painful and completely true story of my childhood.   Oprah, if I write this painful account, would you be willing to use your multi-media empire to help me share it with the world?