Nelson Mandela has asked that Naomi Campbell be banned from his 90^th birthday party.  Meanwhile, Amy Winehouse is preparing to sing at the party.  Maybe it’s time for Naomi to start taking those anger management courses seriously – it’s not a good sign when you’re pointedly turned away from an event where a fainting crackhead with a teeth like a hillbilly streetfighter is welcomed.  

Times On Line

Model Naomi Campbell has been ordered to perform 200 hours of community service as penance for the incident in which she kicked and spat at police officers on board a plane at Heathrow Airport in London.  International jetsetter that she is, sources say, Campbell is now planning a “Community Service World Tour” – she’s done it in New York, now London – hopefully she can do something ugly that’ll get her sentenced to community service in Milan next winter and hopefully Berlin or Paris in 2009 – “much more glamorous than just getting your passport stamped at the airport.”   

associated content

Cops claim that while she was spitting at them and trying to kick and punch them, Naomi Campbell called an airport police officer a “f*****g white honkey,” a  “white ****” and a “white s**g” as she was dragged off the Los Angeles bound jet in handcuffs last week.   Even still, why is it that everything sounds so much more elegant and refined when you say it with a English accent?   

 The Sun

Naomi Campbell has sparked rumors that she’s engaged to her Brazilian businessman boyfriend, Marcus Elias, after she was seen flashing a giant diamond ring he bought her.  A warning, Mr. Elias – the bigger that ring is, the more it’s gonna hurt when she chucks it at you.  Maybe growing up in a country obsessed with soccer you never learned about throwing, but take it from Naomi’s assistant — Naomi has a hell of an arm to go with those legs.  

Eurweb